“If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.
I am a living example of not using my voice when the opportunity presents itself, so I wanted to share some tips to help us on our journey to learning to be asserive and loving it!
When someone cuts infront of you and you get irritated, but not say anything or if you disagree with your boss and say nothing. Does this sound familiar? Being assertive is to stand up for yourself and speak your mind. While this may seems like it is hard to do, try it at first when the opportunity presents itself such as when your supervisor says” Ok, can you write this letter for me? I really want to see what you can do? and your reply would be ” I dont feel comfortable writing a letter when I do not know what happened during the session?”
Learn to be your own advocate
It is important to have your own backbone, which in the long run will make life much easier for you. Look around at those who speak up do better at work, have more time and more healhtier relationships. Follow these three key things to make this happen: (1) Know what you want; (2) beleive you have a right to it and (3) find the courage to express it.
Standing up to your family
At times, it becomes a challenge to stand up to your family and friends, but we make ourselves miserable and frustrated so we need to stand up and just stop this nonsense. It may seem uncomfortable at first, but when you do it you will feel better about yourself. Try the following suggestions (1) Learn to say “No” ( this took me a while to do, but it feels good when you do it); (2) Stick to your values- you need people to respect your values; (3) breaking a pattern- it feels good when you select a restaurant rather than always giving in to your friends choices; (4) At work- learning to become more assertive at work- this will help you to become successful in your career; (5) Ask for a raise or promotion- Just do it! (6) Get your idea green-lighted at a meeting- wait until everyone discusses their idea, before pushing your idea. (7) in public- speak up to those who —lets say the patron gave away your table or the person using the treadmill did not wipe off their sweat. (8) Ask someone to stop doing something that is annoying. Lastly, be wary of how you stand, this sends out a lot of messages.